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What can the Vikings teach me about being well groomed? As it turns out, quite a lot.
The Vikings have acquired a bit of a reputation for being some of the filthiest and dirtiest creatures to ever walk our green Earth. They’re generally regarded as ruthless barbarians who would rather shank a baby than comb their hair. Right?
Archaeologists have discovered finely decorated combs, nail cleaners, washing bowls and even tweezers in recent digs. And they weren’t just being used by nobility, it seems members of all social classes (even down to slaves!) were plucking eyebrows and combing their long golden locks.
An English chronicler named John of Wallingford states that the Vikings’ success with women was due to them having baths on Saturdays, combing their hair and being handsomely dressed.
“In this way, they sieged the married women’s virtue and persuaded the daughters of even noble men to become their mistresses.” – John of Wallingford
1) Always Look Amazing (ALA). If you have confidence issues or low self-esteem this principle is one of the most important you can integrate into your life. Try to always look amazing. Whatever you’re doing, look good doing it. Try to present yourself in your best possible light. Wear complimentary and well-fitted clothes, find a hairstyle that suits you, correct your body language and start a strength routine. You’ll be surprised how much your confidence rockets just because you looks amazing.
2) If the Vikings valued cleanliness, so should you. There is no denying the Vikings were badass motherfuckers who ripped a bloody hole through most of Europe from 800 AD to the late 13th century. But yet, they still had time to maintain decent levels of cleanliness. If you’re not showering everyday, then you’re either a) socially outcast or b) lost the function of smell. Especially if you’re working out and hitting the gym, daily showers are 100% necessary.
3) Looking after yourself is not a pussy move. The Vikings realised that maintaining decent levels of cleanliness and running a comb occasionally through your hair was not just a feminine thing. As Wallingford stated, it actually helped them bag all the hottest and most prized women in Europe. If you have a few stray eyebrow hairs, pluck that shit out. Bad teeth? Go to your dentist. Had the same hairstyle since you were 6? Go see a hairdresser.